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***** again. Remember me?

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    I started a thread way back in 2006 called "For the Kids", about the age of 13. A lot has changed since then.
    I’m soon 18 ( so I can gamble, drink, smoke, get married, get a credit card, invest in stocks, buy knives, lighters, and other such paraphanilia); I’m at sixth form doing Politics, English Lit, and Drama; I’ve had two girlfriends (of which I was engaged to one); I’m still a scout (now a sectional assistant at my local scout group); I saved a mate from overdosing; I’ve got two jobs (recession what recession?); I’ve seen the election of the Tory party once again ( I was 5 when John Major was kicked out); I’ve dabbled in vlogging, stopped wearing as much black, decided I’m a moderate socialist, and started doing parkour (freerunning) but most importantly: I’ve lived.
    2 Years ago my father relapsed, apparenlty because he couldn’t talk to anyone, least of all my mum because her mum had just died. What kind of man does that? Then leaves in the car that he said needed more work than it actually did and hides in Blackpool rather than getting the help he needs? From there he spent about a month in Birmingham then went travelling all over the world. Including Thailand to be with his brother, Ireland, and now finally South London to a Gordon House, and by doing so he has shirked any responsibility towards his family to "look after himself and get better" and I use that in the broadest of definitions.
    So I say now that he doesn’t care. You can argue all you want, but you’ve not there when he has to had to cancel on my little sister because he couldn’t find the accommodation. If I was a father (and no doubt I will be because I’m determined to show that Cowley’s aren’t awful fathers) I would crawl over broken glass and lemon juice to see my children. What I wouldn’t do is then proceed to treat children in a feeble attempt to show love. Time and consistency is what makes love. You want to be forgiven? Be a man and show progress in this area.
    I expect a lot of flack for this post, and quite frankly I don’t care because as far as I’m concerned CG didn’t help at all. The whole institution is just a society of ego strokers, pussy footers, and whingers. You want change? You make the concious effort to change. You hit rock bottom, know how it feels then grow up enough to make the change. Asking people to challenge themselves without actually employing benevolent or tough love that makes the person feel obligated to question themselves is going to make the same progress as asking Simon Cowell to produce and manage a talented musician with the winners from one of his own shows i.e. no bloody good at all. I could be accused of being a cynic for this. I’d call it not being so bloody naiive.
    What I did come here for though was an answer to this simple question: Why would I allow a man with his head in the clouds, who claims that he has always done the best for us, but hasn’t got a clue back into my life? As I’ve outlined he isn’t necessary, I have family, frineds, education, work, and father figures infinitely more reliable, or caring than he. Why should he be given ANOTHER chance GH? Forgiveness is not something that will make me feel better because it wouldn’t have in the first place.
    Kudos to the best answer.

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